The Importance of Rest and Relaxation
I haven't posted much lately and that's because I've felt kind of in a funk as far as my health goes. I'm feeling much better than I was a year ago, but not quite where I want to be. That feels so frustrating! It feels like I'm doing all the right things, and yet there is something missing. But last weekend I think I may have figured out what that is.
I had plans with different friends throughout the weekend and each of the plans for different reasons fell through. I was left with a completely open weekend, and I immediately started to think of all the things I could do to fill up my open weekend: which friends to call to meet for lunch and making a list of things to do around the house, including doing a deep clean of my kitchen. But then a voice inside of me told me to just relax. To allow myself to just be. To read, write in my journal, or whatever I wanted to do without any plans or expectations.
Then I was met with some resistance from my mind. Doing nothing felt indulgent, like I was being lazy. Yet I overcame this feeling because the truth is, I was feeling really exhausted. So I gave in to my gut feeling and just allowed to myself to take the weekend for myself. I didn't make any plans. I didn't call anyone. I just relaxed and did whatever I felt like doing. That included reading a lot and on the beach for a few hours, writing in my journal, cooking healthy meals, walking along the ocean, watching the sunset, taking baths at night, going to bed early and sleeping in as much as I wanted.
I really let myself go to a place of total relaxation, something I rarely do. And the crazy thing is that by Monday morning I felt SO good. My sinuses felt clear for the first time in over a year and a half and it all suddenly clicked for me. What was missing, was rest, relaxation and allowing my body the time to rejuvenate itself. This has always been hard for me as I'm a person that likes to busy and always doing something. However, now that I realized what my body needs and seeing and feeling the results I can no longer deny my body what it is calling out for.
I remember reading a while ago on a website about candida that healing is only about 20% diet and the rest is about lifestyle and mindset. When facing a chronic issue like I have been you really must address things in your life that contributed to getting to the place you are, you didn't get sick overnight and you won't heal overnight. The answers to healing are probably in those places you probably don't really want to look at or make changes in. The parts of your self that you think are who you are on a really deep level. Things you think you could never change. But in life, I'm finding that having rigid feelings like that are what keep us stuck. And sometimes the answers are all on the other side of change.
Keeping myself busy is something that I think I have always done, and I need to examine why. I think of myself as a person who works hard and doesn't need a lot of rest. And on my weekends I always want to do as much as I can. It's like time is running out and I want to fit it all in. Now I know that thinking this way is not good for me. This isn't something that I can completely change overnight, but I know this is something I need to work on.
I can't always spend all weekend relaxing, but I can definitely make an relaxation and rest more of a priority and not feel guilty about it.